PlayStation and Nintendo may rule Japan, but give credit to Microsoft for its exhaustive efforts to make the Xbox brand a competitor. In a move that could turn the tide in favor of Kinect over PlayStation Move, Microsoft has announced an alliance with legendary Japanese developers/studios, including SUDA 51’s Grasshopper Manufacture, Panzer Dragoon and Phantom Dust director Yukio Futatsugi, NanaOn-Sha of PaRappa the Rapper fame, Sega and From Software, to birth the creation of five Xbox 360 titles built exclusively for Kinect. Five games that aren’t silly, casual, shovelware titles that have you dancing, exercising, and flailing your arms in front of the TV like a moron (well, I suppose they will since Kinect requires flailing your arms, but you get my point).

These are the five games, all scheduled for release next year:

“codename D” (Grasshopper Manufacture, Microsoft Game Studios):

From the famed makers of “killer7” and the “NO MORE HEROES” series comes “codename D” from SUDA 51 for Microsoft Game Studios. You must fight for your life to survive an evil amusement park filled with twisted and eerie creatures. With “codename D” for Kinect for Xbox 360, you are the controller as you unleash devastating effects to destroy enemies and objects.

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“Project Draco” (Grounding, Microsoft Game Studios):

The director of the cult hits “Phantom Dust” and “Panzer Dragoon,” game director Yukio Futatsugi, brings you an epic 3-D flying shooter. With the magic of Kinect for Xbox 360, you will be able to nurture and learn to communicate with your dragon as you develop its skills and train it as a partner in combat. Then join friends* on Xbox LIVE to feel the rush of flight as you take to the skies together and experience breathtaking vistas and engage in thrilling battles.

“Haunt” (NanaOn-Sha, Microsoft Game Studios):

Gather friends and family to delve deep into a haunted house dripping with mystery — you’ll need every ounce of your wit and cunning if you hope to unravel the veil of rumors that hide its darkest secret. Dodge traps and outwit ghosts, ghouls and frights that lurk with glee around each and every corner. Take a deep breath and immerse yourself in “Haunt,” spooky fun for Kinect for Xbox 360.

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“Steel Battalion Heavy Armor” (Capcom, From Software):

This all-new game revives the fan-favorite “Steel Battalion” series. With the support of Microsoft, Capcom and From Software join forces to bring this groundbreaking collaborative project to Xbox 360. Manhattan, 2082: In a world where computers and almost all modern technology have been lost, the greatest nations of the world continue to battle for supremacy. The American army lands in New York to begin its first big offensive of a long ground war. Soldiers fire from the trenches as scorched bunkers belch black smoke. As comrades continually fall to the unrelenting crossfire of bullets, the Vertical Tanks make their relentless advance. Experience the battlefield as never before with Kinect for Xbox 360.

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“Rise of Nightmares” (SEGA):

“Rise of Nightmares” offers a spine-tingling horror experience that uses the innovative new controls of Kinect for Xbox 360 to give players the ultimate fright. Using their whole body, players will experience fear and tension as never before in this exclusive Kinect for Xbox 360 horror adventure.

And for the first stage it actually is just those things: unique and refreshingly entertaining. But boy does the game lose its mojo in a hurry. Like far too many Wii games, Major Minor’s Majestic March quickly wears out its welcome because of shallow, unresponsive controls and a general feeling of Wii waggle gimmickry.

Feline drum major Major Minor leads the way in this animorphic marching adventure, commanding his fellow band members with his trusty baton – not just any baton, but a special talking baton named GGGG (Great Great Grandma Gladiola). This entails standing in front of your TV, holding the Wii-mote out in front of you and rhythmically moving it up and down as you march to the beat (or you can just stand still if you’re that lazy). The trick is you have to keep your Wii-mote baton moving at a steady pace to keep all of your band mates happy. March too fast or too slow and your band will dwindle in size, and if you lose your entire crew it’s game over.

As you march through the game’s seven measly stages, you’ll see power-up boxes and eager bystanders lined up along your path, and as you pass them by you can flick the remote left or right to activate the power-up or add the bystander to your band. By performing well you can also enter Drill Mode where you have to shake the remote as fast as you can in indicated directions to fill up a box and make your band perform special drills that boost your score.

Unfortunately, these simple remote maneuvers are incredibly boring to perform and, worse yet, aren’t very responsive. To make matters worse, the music is mostly forgettable, and in general I never felt that my baton waggle movements were truly impacting the musical performance. To me it just felt like I was marching like a doofus watching a parade of monkeys, pigs, puppies, sheep, tigers, goldfish and sunflowers scroll across the screen blaring out generic marching band tunes.

I hate to pile on, but the game is also ridiculously short-lived. It took me no more than 20 minutes to complete the tutorials and seven story stages, I kid you not. You do unlock harder difficulties and multiplayer modes after that, but when the game peters out well before you’ve completed your first play through, going back for seconds and thirds becomes a test of how much boredom you can endure before throwing in the towel.

I give NanaOn-Sha credit for thinking outside the box and at least trying something different, and I have nothing bad to say about the charming artistic work Rodney Alan Greenblat put into the project, but unfortunately as a game I just can’t recommend it.

Young or old, Major Minor’s Majestic March is one march you shouldn’t take.

Pros:
+ Colorful art style and adorable characters
+ It at least tries something different

Cons:
– Shallow, one-dimensional gameplay
– Unresponsive controls
– Short in length and devoid of replay value

Game Info:
Platform: Wii
Publisher: Majesco
Developer: NanaOn-Sha
Release Date: 4/2/09
Genre: Rhythm/Music
ESRB Rating: Everyone
Players: 1-2