<\/p>\n

Don\u2019t know about you, but I could swear that George Santayana and Albert Einstein were camped alongside Brent Gocke and Adrianne Curry at this week\u2019s judges’ panel. The former was mumbling about those who forget the past being doomed to repeat it\u2014even though the past was only just seven days ago\u2014and the latter was offering up that clich\u00e9d definition of insanity. You know, the one about repeating the same actions and expecting different results. Either way, I\u2019m pretty sure the contestants weren\u2019t listening. They were busy playing their new PlayStation Vitas. <\/p>\n

Synopsis:<\/strong> Decked out in fatigues, the contestants split into teams again, this time to navigate an obstacle course and smash targets with a slingshot and cantaloupes. The judges\u2019 panel features a (not really all that) shocking correction to events from episode one. <\/p>\n

Dopey reality-show trope:<\/strong> There\u2019s product placement, and then there\u2019s the middle ten minutes of this episode, which morphs from a giddy fanboy sitdown with Nolan North into a gigantic extended commercial for Uncharted: Golden Abyss<\/em>. (Contestant J-Tight: \u201cGolden Abyss? Just Buy It!\u201d) Yes, there\u2019s no question that it\u2019s one of the PlayStation Vita\u2019s most intriguing launch titles, and part of The Tester\u2019s raison d\u2019etre is to push Sony product, but the feature did more than break the fourth wall\u2014it treated it like Liam Neeson treats wolves and foreign terrorists. <\/p>\n

Jaw-dropping quote:<\/strong> \u201cThat\u2019s who I am. I\u2019m not going to change that for anyone.\u201d burnNibelheim, in her delusional, Rocky-esque exit speech. Um, news flash, Red: You might want to reconsider. Game companies aren\u2019t the only ones likely to frown on would-be employees who duck all responsibility and follow up by pointing fingers at everyone else. <\/p>\n

OK, not bad, actually:<\/strong> What a difference a minute makes. That\u2019s the narrow margin of victory by which the black team avoids being sent to the chopping block. Sixty seconds the other direction, and krystipryde is regretting what unquestionably would have been a fatal cantaloupe run. <\/p>\n

Instead, she and several other contestants end up regretting something else\u2014opening their mouths at the judges\u2019 panel to back a doomed cause. One of the things you\u2019re supposed to learn in kindergarten is that actions have consequences. Another thing you\u2019re supposed to learn is that if you ignore warnings, you can expect to be sent to the corner with no milk and cookies. Or in this case, have Meredith Molinari and her purple eyeliner unceremoniously yank your badge and send you packing. Following the time-honored corporate rule of progressive discipline, the judges make good on threats made to wayward contestants\u2014particularly burnNibelheim, who makes the exact same errors in strategy and judgment she made in episode two. \u201cRemember, it is a judge of character,\u201d Kwajamonster tells her right before they face the panel. How right you are, sister. How right you are. <\/p>\n

And hey, who\u2019d have thought that Egoraptor, who began his stint on the show as a cocky and clueless attention whore, would be the one to deliver a thoughtful and humble exit speech? Maybe the dude\u2019s got a future after all. <\/p>\n

Leader in the Clubhouse:<\/strong> RealityPalez continues to skate through the challenges unscathed, but in this episode, it\u2019s akilleezmight who keeps his head and behaves like a grownup, while all around him are hissyfitting like toddlers at naptime. <\/p>\n

On the Precipice:<\/strong> krystipryde and Kwajamonster. Judging by next week\u2019s previews, one of the guys is gonna get sent home, but two of the three remaining girls seem determined to make like Susan Sarandon and Geena Davis in Thelma and Louise, driving the drama bus straight off the cliff. By opening their mouths to pile on Suzkaiden (again), they\u2019ve put a big glowing target on their own foreheads. And it\u2019s not shaped like a SixAxis button. <\/p>\n

Next week:<\/strong> Combining two challenges that first appeared in season one, the kids have to choreograph and perform some serious LARP\/Street Fighter throwdowns. Capcom is apparently unimpressed. <\/p>\n