<\/p>\n

We\u2019ve talked before about the ways in which Brent Gocke, head Tester<\/em> judge and Sony first-party quality assurance release manager, exudes likability and professionalism the way Emma Stone exudes comic timing. But if Gocke is the personable Everyboss, Todd Papy, the creative director at Santa Monica Studios\u2014and the guy to whom the winner of this little contest will be reporting–is the stone-cold image of Death Incarnate, a merciless, steely-eyed tyrant who\u2019d crush a minion with his index finger for failing to put crushed ice in his morning Mountain Dew. Okay, that\u2019s probably a slight exaggeration, but the death stare and no-bullshit vibe Papy rocks in this week\u2019s episode is more than a little unsettling. He may actually be a teddy bear, but let\u2019s put it this way: You clearly don\u2019t want to miss a beta deadline with this guy. <\/p>\n

In a way, Papy\u2019s the living embodiment of the middle stretch of reality shows like this, the whiplash point at which the fun blinks out like an unplugged PS3 and the clowns and screw-ups are unexpectedly put on irrevocable notice. We\u2019ll see if Skyd1ddy gets the memo in time. <\/p>\n

Synopsis:<\/strong> It\u2019s like beach-blanket bingo, only with more entertainment value, clumsy flailing and sand in the toga: In blindfolded teams of two, contestants scrabble through the sands of Santa Monica Beach to find and match God of War<\/em>-themed objects. The winning team gets to select one losing player to join them on a behind-the-scenes tour at Santa Monica Studios that includes a sit-down interview with Papy and his team. Bottles are lost, twigs are found and the shine finally comes off the show\u2019s Golden Boy. <\/p>\n

Dopey reality-show trope:<\/strong> Emotional moment overload. Kwajamonster and krystipryde weep over the loss of J-Tight and Ninjanomyx (really?) in last week\u2019s double elimination. RealityPalez and Suzkaiden re-enact the cheer-me-up sequence between Cyrus and Amped from Season One. And this week\u2019s loser unleashes a water works that rivals the wettest Bachelor<\/em> farewell speech or Jersey Shore<\/em> bartime bawl. The Tester<\/em> Compound has beer, PlayStation Vitas and a king-sized Sackboy\u2014where the hell are the boxes of Kleenex? <\/p>\n

Jaw-dropping quote:<\/strong> In the season\u2019s first episode, Kwajamonster displayed an almost innate ability to disconnect her brain from the words coming out of her mouth. We get a triple dose of that disconnect this week, reminding us how right she is when she tells us she didn\u2019t think she\u2019d make it this far. We didn\u2019t, either. Let\u2019s break down two: <\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ve got a twiggy thingie!\u201d\u2014Kwaja, trying (and failing badly) to find items that match any of her teammate\u2019s. It\u2019s one thing to come up one set of matched items short of your competition. It\u2019s another to fail on almost every conceivable level. In a challenge that\u2019s based on verbal communication, Kwaja\u2019s head is apparently stuck in the sand. <\/p>\n

Her second quote is even more jaw-dropping : \u201cI\u2019m starting to realize I do want this.\u201d Wow, seriously? So, um, what was going on the other four weeks? Were you just sort of sizing up the Ratchet & Clank<\/em> console in the lobby, polishing your nails and working on building up your PSN friends list? That sound you just heard was 1,000 gamers collectively smashing their heads into their keyboards. <\/p>\n

OK, not bad, actually:<\/strong> Gotta give credit to the producers for tossing some wicked curves into the immunity formula. Winning the challenge doesn\u2019t guarantee it for the second week in a row; acing the sitdown interview with Papy and his crew does. Giving an opportunity to a rival who could potentially swipe immunity out from under you is also a nice twist, although it doesn\u2019t end up being much of a factor. The producers also get credit for whiting out the screens so we can\u2019t see the studio\u2019s secret new project. Ladies and gentleman, that\u2019s how you build buzz and suspense. <\/p>\n

Also love the laser-like way the editors are capturing the reactions of the judges, and, this week, (the Santa Monica guys), to the contestants\u2019 verbal missteps. Anyone who\u2019s ever bombed a debate, job interview or pickup line can totally relate. <\/p>\n

Leader in the Clubhouse:<\/strong> akilleezmight. Dude crushes the blindfold\/communication challenge, then follows up by impressing the entire Santa Monica squad with his poise and charisma during his interview. Given that these are the guys he could potentially be working with\/for, it\u2019s safe to say he\u2019s helped his cause tremendously. <\/p>\n

On the Precipice:<\/strong> From luxury to heartache–so are the days in the Tester<\/em> Compound. In the ten seconds it took him to toss off the Lamest Argument Ever for why akilleezmight and SkyD1ddy should pick him to go to Todd Papy\u2019s pad (\u201cGuy Code!\u201d), RealityPalez, in true Boston Red Sox fashion, has gone from pole position to the brink of complete collapse. Kinda saw it coming, but that doesn\u2019t dampen the Schadenfreude any more than his bitter tears dampen the Sackboy doll Suzkaiden uses to try to cheer him up. Unlike Hugh Grant and Robert Downey, Jr., something tells us there isn\u2019t gonna be a redemptive chapter (or Sony job) in Reality\u2019s story. <\/p>\n

Next week:<\/strong> Yep, we\u2019ve definitely hit the Lord of the Flies<\/em> portion of the season\u2014pass the conch, willya? Or rather, pass the surveys: Every contestant has to answer difficult questions about their housemates, then see those answers become public, Newlyweds-style, as part of a challenge that involves balancing and stacking towers of wood blocks. Clearly, somebody sucks at Jenga. And somebody really sucks at alliances. <\/p>\n